Recently, I had an en-depth conversation with a soon-to-be divorced gentleman while I was out of state on business. He explained the perfect relationship to me and it goes a little something like this:
He said he was married for 29 years and he was unhappy in his marriage half of the 29 years. He said he stayed in the relationship because he was a Godly man and Godly men don’t divorce. I actually agree with him on that one, because once you’re married it is for life. The reason being is because getting married is making a covenant with God. Covenants with God are something not to be taken lightly. At the age of 54, his two kids are all grown up and he decided that he didn’t want to spend the last “X” years of his life unhappy. He quoted one of Dr. Seuss’ books and said “To find out where it’s at, is to find out where it’s not.” I couldn’t find the quote anywhere, but that’s what he said. He said he knew that his wife was not where his happiness is at, which is sad. What was interesting is the way he decribed the perfect relationship. He said, “this it what it’s all about, Jen.”:
To have the perfect relationship is simple, yet so hard to find. You have to find someone that is looking at you all the time, filling all your needs and in return their needs are met. You have to be looking upon each other with the same love and actions. He said he hasn’t found that in life yet, but is confident that is the perfect relationship. I think he’s right. If someone truly loves you, they will look upon you to fulfill your needs and in return, because your happiness is met their happiness is met as well. ツ
*Here’s to the perfect relationship { }!
That is an interesting description of a perfect relationship! It’s got me thinking… I think I would add that the perfect relationship is grounded in a love that is both expressed and found by the lover. When lover and beloved want to fill each others needs and in so doing find their own happiness, I think that is an unbelievable thing! Searching for one to love me so much that they are happy in loving me AND searching for one that I can love so much that I am happy in loving them… that seems like the perfect relationship. One other thought, I think one can learn this kind of love. One’s love may begin in a more selfish or immature way, but if the lover and beloved grow, they will find meaning both in loving as well as being loved. In this way, perfect love isn’t so much found as it is learned in relationship. Great post! Thank you Jen!